diapers and a vent

I've spent much of the week looking at diapers! Jen, Fia and Alice have been very helpful in providing me with some info re: cloth diapers. It's all a bit daunting to the uninitiated because there are so many options... from prefolds to all in ones, from fitteds to pocket diapers. Yikes... where to start. And then there are some that need covers, some that don't... and then there's organic or not, cotton or bamboo, and then there is sizing (by weight or one size diapers which adjust.). And thus it goes on...

And then there's the question of how many diapers one needs... as well as how many of each type. And, well, how will I get on with the prefolds which involve some sort of folding and pinning. Oy.

Motheringdotcommune, this wonderful online community (thanks, Jen!), has been a wonderful resource too, and many more experienced mamas have provided me with some great advice. I've found someone online who makes fitted, organic, bamboo, one size diapers. They're like gold dust to get ahold of. She stocks her virtual shelves and they sell out immediately. I contacted her, though, and she said she can do a custom order.. which is very exciting :)

Now I have to look for prefolds, covers, and some all in ones. Here are some covers I've been coveting :)



I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by the things we have to think about. We're planning to co-sleep but I feel as though we need to think about a bassinet, at least, if only for naps.. and, well, if co-sleeping isn't working out for any one of us. So much to think about...

..............

And now a rant...

Aside from all the baby stuff - which is both stressful and fun to think about (I've been practicing putting the stroller up!!)- today has been a bit of a shocker. It didn't start terribly well as I had one of those morning when even with zofran I'm on the verge of vomiting. I couldn't finish my very bland breakfast and then had to stop halfway to work thinking I was about to be sick... Not fun. And then I got to work and it went downhill very quickly. I'll just say that telling someone how huge they are over and over again is not terribly good for one's self-esteem, and whilst I'd love to say that I am immune to such comments there really is a limit. And, really, it just seems to be basic etiquette not to compare your pregnant body to someone else's. Surely people know not to say things such as 'Alex, you're SO big... so and so is 34 weeks pregnant and only a little bit bigger than you. you're huge.. and, well, this so and so was a size zero and has a washboard stomach and you hardly can tell she's pregnant.. and, wow, look at you, you are really really big'.

Oy.

I was so clearly not comfortable and yet continue she did... by the end I was practically in tears. Well, in actual fact Rich called me just as I got to my office and burst into sobs about 15 minutes before my 8am class.

I really don't mind people commenting on my pregnant body. I like my growing tummy and the fact that it's helping a little baby grow and thrive but there were so many value judgments embedded in the remarks today, and they weren't lost on me. As Fia and others noted to me... when on earth did it become the goal of a pregnant woman not to look pregnant?

Today, then, was not my favorite day. Please, please, universe, let the rest of the week be better.

Homesick

I am feeling a little homesick, lately. Today I was listening to an old 'The Beautiful South' song which I used to listen in high school. Rich actually bought me their CD our first Christmas together! Anyway, it had me searching for old photographs online (as I don't really have any so I had to rely on the web to take me down memory lane... I lived in a little village called Combeinteignhead (who can pronounce that!?)

I didn't find any of our house, though I did find some of the beach and 'brook' where our house was. We lived along the river with steps down to the 'beach'. The River Teign is a tidal river which runs into the sea.. I spent many a happy hour in my rowing boat going up and down the river.. (I should add that it was without parental supervision, life jacket, etc!! Indeed my row boat was always with some hole or another which my dad would fix periodically with some fiberglass. I think I must have been around 7! How things have changed re: parents and safety!).




On the other side of our house - across a country lane - were fields and fields of lambs and a little pig farm owned by our neighbours.



And this is a place where we spent much of our time!!! The local pub... sitting outside in the beer garden with crisps and a coke waiting for dad to finish playing pool :)



And who knew that there was a Keats' poem about Teignmouth... the place I went to school!! Even Arch Brook (where I lived) is mentioned!!

Teignmouth

by John Keats (1795-1821)


[‘Some Doggerel’ sent in a letter to B.R. Haydon]

‘HERE ALL THE SUMMER COULD I STAY’

For there’s Bishop’s teign
And King’s teign
And Coomb at the clear Teign head -
Where close by the stream
You may have your cream
All spread upon barley bread.

There’s arch Brook
And there’s larch Brook
Both turning many a mill;
And cooling the drouth
Of the salmon’s mouth,
And fattening his silver gill.

There is Wild wood,
A Mild hood
To the sheep on the lea o’ the down,
Where the golden furze,
With its green, thin spurs,
Doth catch at the maiden’s gown.

There is Newton Marsh
With its spear grass harsh -
A pleasant summer level
Where the maidens sweet
Of the Market Street,
Do meet in the dusk to revel.

There’s the Barton rich
With dyke and ditch
And hedge for the thrush to live in
And the hollow tree
For the buzzing bee
And a bank for the wasp to hive in.

And O, and O
The daisies blow
And the primroses are waken’d,
And violets white
Sit in silver plight,
And the green bud’s as long as the spike end.

Then who would go
Into dark Soho,
And chatter with dack’d-hair’d critics,
When he can stay
For the new-mown hay,
And startle the dappled prickets?

Poppet On Film: Part Two

In this riveting clip you can see the 4D parts... it's pretty amazing to see how he wraps his hands around the umbilical cord. And, wow, there is no mistaking that he's a little 'boy'!

Hiya Poppet: 24 week scan

We had another scan today - at just under 24 weeks. We'll be having them monthly until 32 weeks and then - much to my surprise - we'll be having them weekly. They're just being precautionary and we're hopeful that everything will run smoothly. Indeed, today, everything looked just perfect! He's still measuring a few days ahead and he's already a whopping 1 pound nine ounces :) No wonder I had that growth spurt!

The sonnographer put the 4D capabilities on and we got some sweet, sweet snaps. These are actually stills from the DVD as I have yet to scan in the official pictures!!




He's clinging to the umbilical cord!



A couple of profile shots...



Poppet's little leg preparing to kick me :)

Where did this come from?!

This week a lot of people have been kindly(!?) telling me how huge I am. Now, I am not sure 'huge' is a word that one ever wishes to hear... but it seems that there is no hiding things now. I definitely look pregnant to the unknowing onlooker (although I did have to actually point it out to the associate dean last week, when he asked me to do something over the summer). Oh well.

I've been taking pictures on my i-mac this past month or so. What a difference a month can make:

I felt as though I had really popped here, at 19 weeks (the day after the scan)



But, oh, my! What has happened at 23 weeks and a bit weeks? I'm now 24 weeks and I feel even bigger. What's shocking to me is that I only gained a pound and a half between 20 and 23 weeks. What have the next few months got in store for me?!

Nesting..

Another busy week followed by a busy weekend... but it's been quite a nice couple of days. I have been taking photographs of my ever expanding tummy, and, mercy, is it growing on a daily basis. Last night, when we were out at a lecture, it was the first time that people seemed to realize that I was definitely pregnant!

I will have to post pics... well, maybe :)

Whilst I'm not a fan of evolutionary explanations of the human species - especially when it comes to sex/gender - I have been caught off guard by something: nesting.

Now, I'm not someone who you could accuse of being house proud, though it's true that space is important to me... but nesting, etc? Well, apparently (or perhaps it's maybe a VERY rational realization that we have to be more organized and prepared...

This was few weeks I have been lamenting about the state of our floors. With two dogs and a kitty and a gritty driveway during mud season, our hardwood floors and rugs are plenty dirty. Our newish vacuum does a terrible job. This has been causing no end of internal angst... and it's given rise to a desire for a Dyson. I know, i know!!

Rich has not been so keen on the idea... which made me quite cross as I'm not quite sure he's getting it. Yesterday, though, I convinced myself that we just have to have one.. and of course they're extremely expensive. Extremely. Rich just couldn't see the point in it.

" Don't you care that our rugs are in need of a good clean, that our floors are always dirty because of the pups. And don't you care that little Rafi will be crawling amongst the doggy hair and the cat fur?"

And so the discussion ensued.

I did get a little upset about it (yikes) and by the time we got to the talk (an amazing lecture my Dr. Greger, speaking on human health and nutrition) I'd browbeaten poor old Rich into thinking that a very expensive Dyson was a good idea.

So, today, whilst we were looking for new bathroom suites (not so much a nesting thing but a necessity given our current bathrooms) I saw that Home depot were having a sale on their Dysons.. Oh, lord, I just couldn't resist and we came home with the Dyson Animal...



I spent a blissful couple of hours hoovering our rugs and, yikes, how filthy they were. Even Rich was impressed :)

I am finding that I have a desire for everything to be clean and finished... and we have lots to finish. I did find some non-toxic paint for the poppet's nursery today, which made me endlessly happy. And this morning I bypassed the gym so that I could get on with some chores - which included doing our taxes. I barely recognize myself!!

A bit of a moan...

It's hard to believe that I am close to six months! The past couple of months have flown by. Increasingly, I am becoming very impatient for the little guy to arrive. When I was driving home from my evening class on Monday, tired and with a horrid headache, I thought about how lovely it would be to be going back to the Poppet. I just can't wait!

But then again I have done so little so it's probably a good thing that we have a few more months :)

Things have been very busy and stressful at work. I have taken on far too much this semester, and keep on taking more... I am feeling somewhat indebted that the Dean has given me paid leave in the fall... for the ENTIRE semester. I am extremely, extremely fortunate as there is no policy at the university, and previous deans and presidents have been very much against it. While I will be given a few tasks to do from home (just working on our department website, for now), it means that I will have from the middle of May to the middle of January off. Phew.

In being so appreciative I keep saying yes to students, other faculty, the dean, etc., and this work I feel so thoroughly worn out.

Warning... this is a bit of a whinge...

But I feel so fatigued and run down. I'm not sleeping at all well, even though I wake up at 3am VERY tired, I can't seem to fall back to sleep. I think it's the fact that Poppet is having a little dance party, or something. That, and I have a trillion things running through my mind and I frequently need to pee! I've also been experiencing quite severe headaches in the afternoon and I have my second cold sore in a month. Boo. The ongoing sickness has taken a turn for the worst this week, as well.

Oh, how did I forget about the fact that my feet are beginning to swell? Which is just... well, swell!

Working out seems to really help with the fatigue. I noticed that as I did an hour on the elliptical yesterday that I was slowing down, though...

Things are also wonderful, too.

A lulu list

1) I'm so grateful to be pregnant. Even with all the whinging ^^^ I am always so happy to be expecting this little fellow. When we toured the other local hospital, Maine Med, I though about being there (well, the other hospital, probably) and I felt like crying.

2) My friends - you lot - have been so wonderful to me. I don't know what I'd do without you. And especially my more local friends, especially Jen (and David and Sage, of course).

3) I'm really glad that I joined a gym! I know.. I ordinarily hate gyms, but I'm grateful that it's allowed me to continue working out, which makes me feel better in every way.

4) It's SPRING! The warmer weather is on its way, and even though it might not be 'warm' by others' standards, it's certainly warm for Maine, right now. Walking the puppies yesterday evening with the late sun shining and the snow receding, was pretty wonderful.

5) For my new stroller :)

6) The maternity leave I have... I don't know what we'd have done or how we'd have coped without it.

7) Rich and the pups... Kiltie continues to want to lie on me, or right next to me. He can definitely sense that something is going on. While we decided that we'd start easing Kiltie into sleeping downstairs when we got back from our hols, I can't bring myself to do it yet. Every night he curls up right next to my tummy... it's just too precious! I know we have to do it soon, though. I'm also grateful that Rich is going to get rid of the 'kitchen couch' this week. Right Rich? it's been SIX weeks :)

8) So grateful for Deb, who I see today.