We have an incredibly joyful and sweet little boy. There's not a day when I don't feel unbelievably lucky to have such a sweet little boy. On Thursday nights Rich is late home so I take Raf to bed. I have to confess that a lot of the time I do resent that I don't get to have a little alone time on those evenings as I go to bed at 7pm with Raf and I usually don't get to come back downstairs. It's especially difficult as Raf is a bit of nightmare to help to get to sleep, and i think it's even worse when I go up with him, so for almost 2 hours I usually have a little squirmy boy who is up and down, kicking and thrashing, cuddling and standing, etc. it drives me bonkers!
Yet last night as I lay there with the squirmy little poppet who couldn't quite make up his mind whether he was going to try and sleep (I can't express how much he squirms and gets up and down), I was struck by how temporary this is, how these evenings are precious and short-lived, and how, before I know it, this little boy isn't going to want to fall asleep with his arms wrapped tightly around my neck with his face buried in my hair. He's not going to want to lie on top of me with his legs and arms like a little starfish, outstretched and utterly dependent.
If only we could just press pause. We say this at least five times a day, and while I do love seeing this little boy's personality emerge, he is just so much fun - even with all the toddler drama - and maybe even because of it.
So last night as I lay in bed with Raf, him not sleeping, him getting up and down, standing up and bouncing on the bed, him clambering on top of me... and then off again, standing up again, and so forth, I pretended to be asleep and started to pretend to snore. And of course this made him laugh and then he started to pretend to snore, and then I did, and then he did. And inevitably I started to laugh, too.
Raf will be two in July and it seems that time has never flown so fast. Slow down, slow down - little boy - you sweet, beautiful light of our life. When I walk through the door and see the little boy so full of joy and excitement when he sees me, I feel as though I literally may burst with delight.