Thursday, June 24, 2010

On Sleep

Raf is in bed asleep... which is nice, except Rich is up there lying with him, waiting for me to relieve him of his duties. We co-sleep, which we all love, but we had the goal of having Raf be in his cot for a couple of hours per night so that RIch and I could just have a bit of time in the evenings. This was going quite well - though it didn't happen consistently -but for a couple of weeks we've had quite a bit of regression.

I helped get Raf to sleep tonight, and as I fed him and stroked his hair I remembered how important this is, how his little body collects bodily memories which will remain deeply with him for the rest of his life, and while it can be frustrating at times, and the frequent wake-ups can be difficult, too, it seems much more important to have tenderness and trust incorporated into his corporeal memory, and for his limbs and tissues and hormones - and all the stress that courses through him when he's struggling to get to sleep and stay asleep - to be treated kindly and with patience.

And, as if by magic, Rich is downstairs and Raf is in his cot :)


  1. tenderness and trust, kindness and patience -- how absolutely lovely a mother you are. Raf is a lucky boy. I absolutely agree that our bodies retain these memories. Raf will be well set up for life having you around.

  2. makes me tear up. you're a made-to-be mummy. Rafman is a lucky, lovely boy.

  3. awww
    what a wonderful mum you are :)

  4. Alex, you say this so well. Thank you. And I believe you're right.

    Plus, the photo is adorable!

    See you tomorrow! Yay!